Commented on the poem "Sleep" on 11/26/08 at 07:55 AM
Ah, the cruelty of sleep when it withholds its soothing qualities and instead chooses to torment. I think, what i like most about this piece is how well you've captured that gnawing feeling of wanting to sleep but not being able to. The restlessness, the 'toss and turn' feel of being deprived of rest- you brought that into the poem so well and that makes this piece all the more vividly expressive. Excellent way to end it too, with "somniferous blessing" ..so right. Very well done, Mari!
Ah, i remember this beautiful piece. Serenity is what exudes from this and makes it so pleasing to read. The first ten words, it's so soothing. I just think, though this falls into a specific genre, that anyone who simply wishes to relax can read this and just bask in the sheer splendor of your words.
Writes like this bring me back to the atrocities that seem so commonplace in this world, today. It seems as if the more power grows, the amount of people who want that power grows and pretty soon we're left with nothing but situations like these. It's horrid. With structure, form and just afew words, you've made an excruciating point, 11th.
As always with your work, this is a moving piece that combines creativity, inspiration and the beauty of culture with an important message. It is indeed such a such sad truth, that this 'succumbing' due to a lack of preventives seems to be an endless cycle, as the end of this piece suggests. Thought-provoking, 11th.
I like that last line and how it pretty much sums up the 'end of the day' theory. There are many ways to take this write and i'm inclined to think most would believe it to be of a bitterness, but i don't know, it seems more matter-of-fact to me. Like, you're just stating what is happening, with a detachment that is the best defense when faced with these trials.
"A horrid laugh from behind closed doors
As I lay in a pile on the floor"
..the laughs of those who find joy in the hardships of others. Tsk, such a sad truth isn't it? Well expressed with a deep emotional yet detached (appealing contrast) feel.
A Time For Everything.. i Trust, i Shall.
October 13, 2008 at 03:11 AM
[[I'm going to be on somewhat of a hiatus til' the 24th of Nov. Finals and all. So, i'll be catching up on writes about once a week. Bear with me, please.]]
-edit-
Indeed, exams ended as of the 24th. I shall resume reading starting now, so.. can't wait. =]
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Commented on the poem "Sleep" on 11/26/08 at 07:55 AM
