Tuesday, July 1, 2008::

And every time I think of him, I think of something futuristic
Like..wow..I could really have this
Cause as the days go on life gets better and worse,
all at once
And yes, I know that sounds crazy but it..is what it is

So I think of his voice..sounding like every boy I've ever dreamed of
Perfect, in control, sweet..never forcing me
Hoping that maybe I'll say yes, but it's still okay if I say no
Promising me that..everything will be okay
Because despite my insecurities and suicidal tendencies,
one day I'm going to find somebody who's going to really love me
Even if it's ten years from now rather than next week,
I'll still find someone
He apologizes in advanced, because we both know he won't be the boy I'll marry
But says on school days through uneducated hallways,
he can be the one I kiss, the one who holds me tight, close, proud
Never afraid of what might come to be,
because he's ready to see me happy and smiling
I want to be able to say that it's his work that put half the smile on my face
I want us to be everything that anyone else ever dreamed of

And maybe people will look at us and say that it's not real
Cause we're just high school kids playing high school games,
but, it'll still mean something to me
It will mean learning from the mistakes I make when I'm young,
cause I'll know what already makes me mad when I'm grown
Forget about all the.."true love doesn't come to minds too young to understand..
and that's why these little girls nowadays get pregnant and catch STDs.."
But I'm sick of their stereotypical statistics about the youth
Because love hits all of us in the same place..the heart..
and you don't have to be grown to feel that

Cause no one ever said I was IN love..
it's just love
Or maybe not JUST anything..it's..everything
Filling up the pieces of me, I cry when he tries to solve my puzzle
When he..searches in my eyes or my words for meaning
Because he believes that my heart is too fragile to reach for..
he's afraid of hurting me and the mistakes that he might make,
so he doesn't want to break me

But this boy...
changing more and more each day to make me feel like..something
Trying so hard not to let him constitute who I am..
and able to get these emotions off my chest but..
the words he's said for me have become priceless..
so I've saved them in my heart for a moment when I might get to feel his kiss..
again